Monday, February 02, 2009

High school redux

Junior high and high school for me took place from 1973-1979, so over 30 (!) years ago, but sadly and incredibly, it seems like yesterday. Those years were so intense... so miserable...so fraught with yuck... that they still appear in my dreams even today.

Do you remember the mean girls? I wonder if every school had them. In both junior high and high school, there was a group of girls who weren't exactly bullies by today's standards, but they were mean. They would say mean things, laugh at you, intimidate you. I remember going to great lengths to avoid them. This sometimes meant avoiding the girls' bathroom altogether. Which was difficult.

Recently, one of these mean girls "friended" me on Facebook. Apparently, she doesn't remember how she behaved in junior high/high school, or if she does remember, she doesn't care. I guess she feels that time has healed whatever bad things took place between us. Or most likely, she doesn't even remember or realize what she did.

So what is she like today? It's a bit hard to tell exactly from her Facebook profile. Oddly, someone else I know (from a completely different part of my life) knows her today, and commented to me that she probably isn't the kind of person that I would befriend, but she has probably mellowed out somewhat since high school.

Interesting. And strange. Part of me still wants to be mean to her, after 30 years, and pay her back. Isn't that weird?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Adena - I understand 1000 percent where you are coming from and it is NOT weird. You've got a lot of company in this one, sistah.
- Marcy

Anonymous said...

I have to show what you wrote to my daughter who is convinced it is only her grade who is evil.
B

nachtwache said...

Yep, you're normal. I really think these kids learn such behaviour at home. Did you remind this one what she was like?
We're like hens in a yard full of chickens, where the ones at the top of the 'social ladder' peck the ones below them. If your child is at the bottom, getting picked on by most, the only thing you can do, is to move them to another school.
It's up to parents to teach kindness and compassion, but not all parents do that.