Sunday, February 08, 2009


I'm feeling much better. My surgeon told me to rest, and I've rested. My right side is still sore where the incisions are, but really not terribly sore. I'm probably going to head into work tomorrow. I'm feeling pretty normal.

On the other hand (there's always another hand - sometimes more than one) I'm worried about the results that I have yet to receive. Here's what I'm worried about:

1. clean margins - did the surgeon manage to get a 2 millimeter margin around the tumor that she removed? if she didn't, will I have to have more surgery?

2. lymph nodes - did pathology find cancer in the lymph nodes (or node - I think it was only 1) that were/was removed? if there is no cancer, I may be able to avoid chemo and just have radiation. if there is cancer, they may need to take out more lymph nodes, and I'll probably need chemo.

3. genetic testing - I haven't been thinking a lot about the genetic test that is being evaluated...but the 3 week point is coming up. Although the chance is low, it is a possibility. If I come up positive for the genetic mutation, that will mean that they'll want to take out my ovaries, that I'll have to decide about a prophylactic double mastectomy (which I think I'm leaning against) and may impact other members of my family. Yuck.

So there you have it, in black and white. My body is healing from the surgery, but I still have some potentially difficult news to receive. Or the news could be great. Or some great, some bad. There's always that third hand....


nachtwache said...

I'm sending you some get well wishes and hope you'll get good news!

christina(apronstrings) said...

warm thoughts of good health and peace sent your way.

Anonymous said...

I was so happy to see you're feeling good and at work today but I see there's so much more. A lot to think about and many hands...

RivkA with a capital A said...

I find that it is better not to get caught up worrying about "what if"s.

When I am waiting for test results, I do whatever I can to distract myself until I get the results.

I am not saying it's easy. It's not.

But it is a coping technique that I learned from my doctor.

There are infinite "what if"s. But only one reality. So, it pays to wait and see what the reality really is.

Good luck!